If I had a dime for every time a client tells me ‘I can’t do it’….well I would have a rather impressive collection of dimes! Confidence is the number one reason why people do not ever break free from the 9-5 and become their own boss.
Ok, I get that bills have to be paid, but there is more than one way to approach this conundrum. I, like thousands of other people started my business whilst lining the pockets of my employer at the same time. I worked the 9-5 for them, and the 5-9 for myself. Yes, it gave me a lot of hours, and not it wasn’t easy but I could not afford to have a massive drop in income either.
Gradually over time I was able to drop my employed hours to part time, and then finally no time! The only thing that kept me going was the confidence I had in my own abilities and ideas. I had done my research, found my niche in the market, I knew I could do this. I believed I could find the work.
Ultimately, I believe in myself.
2) If at first you don’t succeed
The best friend of confidence, determination is a key feature of breaking free. When I wanted part time hours I had to change my role, and the day I left over 20 people must have come up to me and said they would be next. They would not stay within the company for another year , they have plans.
That was almost a decade ago, and to the best of my knowledge only 3 have left.
If you really want out, there is a way. But you have to have determination and grit. If you start to break free but find your new plan isn’t working out as you expected – change it, try again and try harder. I knew with every fibre in my being that I did not want to work for an employer and do that 9-5 grind. I had to get out. For me it wasn’t a dream, it was a reality waiting to happen.
Determination pushes your dreams into realities.
3) It is a non-negotiable social convention
My clients often tell me that they cannot make the changes they want because it is not socially acceptable. I hear things like ‘My father was a doctor, I am expected to follow in his footsteps’ or ‘Everyone in our family went to Yale, I have to go there and study something I don’t want to’
Social expectation creates clones.
If UK millionaire Sir Alan Sugar had conformed to expectation he certainly would not have been the millionaire success he is today. Richard Branson? the same. They broke the mould and decided to do things differently. Much the same as I did. I tried to fit in and conform, honest I did. But it was boring. I hated it. So I am afraid I stuck two fingers up to social expectation and did it my way.
I can laugh at the ‘I hate Monday’s’ brigade now. Monday is just another day in my self planned, self governed schedule of work, and honestly? I normally go out for coffee on a Monday morning.
Sucks to be me hey! Which leads me nicely to my next point
4) Green is not your colour darling
I am the subject of a lot of envy, and I have to say I don’t really get it. I am nothing exceptional. I have done nothing remarkable. I have just used my own motivation, my own desire and I have fought for what I wanted. I have rejected what I didn’t want.
Envy really is an ugly emotion people.
If you sit and look through a green tinted haze of jealousy at a friend, colleague or even person in the media, wishing you had their lives, you are wasting time.
If you do that, you will never succeed.
If that is hard to hear then I’m sorry but that is a fact. Wake up and get over yourself. Frankly it doesn’t matter if they landed on their feet, inherited millions or were a self starting business person. They have made it, and one sure fire way to never get there yourself is to sit in envy. There will always be someone that has something you want. You need to give up envy and take up confidence and determination.
Believe you too can achieve, and do you know what? You will.
5) Scaredy cat?
But, but, but….it is all so scary. Yeah it is. But for me, that is half the fun. I know what I need to do to live, and pay my bills etc, the rest is ‘take a chance’ time. I am always trying new things, I am always pushing boundaries and thinking outside of my box.
For me the fear is proof that I am alive, the proof that I am not just another minion on the treadmill of corporate greed. I have seen people walk away from high paying jobs, with masses of debt, and they are flying!
My all-time favourite internet meme that gets touted around Facebook daily is this.
What if I fall?…but oh my darling what if you fly? (Erin Hanson).
6) Put your back into it
The second biggest reason people fail? They can talk the talk, but when it comes to walking that walk, well they really cannot be bothered. I have no idea what happens in TV shows, I do not know who the Biggest Loser is, I haven’t a clue who shot JR…why? Because I would rather be working and building the life I am going to have.
‘I was going to write my best selling novel, but the golf was on.’ ‘I was going to sell 300 units but I was tired so I watched tele’. Now, I am not saying I am a workaholic, as I say my monday mornings usually consist of lots of tea and meaningless chatter, but I do put the hours in.
The more success you achieve the more choosey you can be with your time.
But, when I was first starting out, and quite often even now, I will still be working at 10pm. Isn’t that self defeating? Well for me, no. I have my comfy chair, my laptop, my dogs on my lap…. If my children need me, I will stop in an instant. I have freedom. I can lose a few $$$$ by taking an evening off, but rather than watch mindless drivel on the tele box I would rather grab a few more $$$$ meaning I don’t have to worry about a meal out, a soccer match, or just chilling watching a movie with them. BUT IT IS A BALANCE.
The most frustrated failures are the ones who believe that just deciding to start their own business is enough to guarantee success. Make the connection between hard graft on your terms and all the success you could ever imagine!
So, what are you waiting for? Get out of the rat race today!